Category: Mitch McConnell

Snow Job

2/23/2021

Texas was hit by quite a winter storm last week, and almost the entire state lost power (thanks to past poor decisions by their GOP leaders in how to handle power -- electric power, that is -- throughout the state). To top it off, Ted Cruz then fled Texas for sunny Cancun for a family vay-cay while his constituents suffered back home with no power, little to no food, and no water. Instead of staying in Texas to help, the Cruz family checked into the Ritz Carlton Hotel where its Fantino restaurant offered a $100-plus "Roasted Caribbean lobster and scallop green risotto with optional Osetra caviar and wine pairing" and their spa provided Mayan Synergy body wraps and facials.

On Twitter, @JulieRoginsky tweeted all about it: "I get it now. Ted and Heidi Cruz wanted their children to be safe, to have basic sanitary services like heat and running water, to leave behind a third-world apocalyptic nightmare for a safe place. Like so may parents before them, they decided to cross the Mexican border."

When Cancun Cruz got wind of the crisis (i.e., that he was being raked over the coals back), he booked a one-way flight to Houston.

Radical Right wing talking-heads then bemoaned, "Why should Cruz apologize? What could he have done to help?" Well, I suppose they just need to check in with AOC and Beto. They with countless others worked their asses off to help Texans in need of food, water, and warmth.

In response to the crisis in Texas (and the complete power failure of GOP policies), I have posted Emmett Lee Dickinson's poem "They won't frown always -- some sweet Day" below on the left. Dickinson's poem inspired third cousin Emily to pen her poem with the same opening line below on the right.

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

They won't frown always – some sweet Day
When they get power back –
They'll recollect how cold they were
And how the snow was “Packed.”

Then They will hasten to the Warmth
To thaw their frozen Form
And cannot think They’ll get more Ice
That fills the coming storm.

By Emily Dickinson:

They won't frown always – some sweet Day
When I forget to tease –
They'll recollect how cold I looked
And how I just said "Please."

Then They will hasten to the Door
To call the little Girl
Who cannot thank Them for the Ice
That filled the lisping full.

The crisis in Texas was just some of the news from last week. In other stories, Grand Wizard Trump got into a MyPillow fight with Moscow Mitch, Rush Limbaugh was greeted at the gates of Hell by Jerry Falwell, and Kim Kardashian called it quits with Kanye West. Pics from last week's stories are below. Click the images to enlarge.

CURE-ious

3/24/2020

From Dorothy Dawe:

When it comes to the coronavirus global pandemic, we have no leadership at the Federal level. Trump is just too incompetent and greedy. He’s tried to put on a show during recent press briefings so that he can play "president -- although he sounds more like a doofus as he stumble over big words like “asymptomatic." Trump as "president" is all a sham.

As a result, state governors have had to take up the mantle of leadership. However, that comes with issues as they have to work against each other to obtain much needed testing kits and the necessary PPE for their own state’s doctors and nurses. There is no federal oversight. No one at the top is coordinating anything.

And now that Trump has realized that some of his hotels and golf courses have closed up shop (due to various governors’ orders), he’s tweeting out a new tune: “the cure” can’t be worse than the problem itself.

Now he’s desperate to “reopen” America. He and his Klan even have people clamoring that we should just let the coronavirus do its job – which would mean wiping out hundreds of thousands if not a million or more of our fellow citizens.

He’s even started screaming at us with all cap tweets:

Today he said he wanted America to reopen on Easter:

Why Easter?

“Easter is a very special day for me ... Easter Sunday,” said the man who cannot recite one verse from the Bible (although he is very familiar with two Corinthians), “and you'll have packed churches all over our country."

That line prompted the spread of a very apt and amusing hashtag on Twitter: #BloodySunday.

Trump's all-cap rant called to mind Emmett Lee Dickinson's poem "He screams -- it's not good he is screaming" (below on the left). Dickinson's poem inspired third cousin Emily to pen her poem "We dream -- it is good we are dreaming" (below on the right).

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

He screams – it’s not good he
is screaming –
It will hurt us – we are afraid –
And now he’s planning to – kill us,
And as he’s planning – shriek –

What harm? Men die – conveniently –
It is a truth – of Blood –
But we – are dying his Trauma –
His Trauma – is what we dread –

Cautious – We jar each other –
And keep watch – with open eyes –
Lest his Fascism – end in Mistake–
And in morbid Demise

Cast us to Shafts of Granite –
With just our Age – and Name –
And perhaps a phrase of Remembrance –
Connected to – his scream –

By Emily Dickinson:

We dream – it is good we
are dreaming –
It would hurt us – were we awake –
But since it is playing – kill us,
And we are playing – shriek –

What harm? Men die – externally –
It is a truth – of Blood –
But we – are dying in Drama –
And Drama – is never dead –

Cautious – We jar each other –
And either – open the eyes –
Lest the Phantasm – prove the Mistake–
And the livid Surprise

Cool us to Shafts of Granite –
With just an Age – and Name –
And perhaps a phrase in Egyptian –
It's prudenter – to dream –

But what of protecting our population?

Today on the Senate floor, as Mitch McConnell pushed for a billion dollar slush fund for Wall Street and corporate America, he spoke passionately about our elderly citizens, the ill and the immunocompromised.

"If they are going to die," said McConnell, "they had better do it, and decrease the surplus population."

The Lyin' King

1/21/2020

From our political correspondent, Dorothy Dawe:

It’s all over the news – Prince Harry and Meghan Markle will “step back from royal duties” and will no longer receive public funds for royal duties. They will also no long use their HRH titles.

Almost simultaneously, the GOP announced new arrangements with Donald Trump: Mitch “Midnight Mitch” McConnell announced this week that Trump is now to be recognized as “his royal highness,” and he & his family will receive tax-payer funds to cover all of their private ventures and schemes, including any and all jaunts to Europe, safari trips, and golf holidays. McConnell added, “This new model will take effect immediately.”

So Trump, for whom the GOP has circled the wagons – or in this case, the royal carriages – is now our uncrowned King, and following the sham-trial (and expected acquittal) in the Senate, the US Constitution will be rendered meaningless (except for the Second Amendment). Henceforth, we will now refer to the United States as "US2A."

The new reign of King Donald calls to mind Emmett Lee Dickinson's now-classic poem, "Title divine – is his!" (below on the left). Dickinson's poem inspired third cousin Emily to pen her poem, "Title divine – is mine!" (below on the right).

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

Title divine – is his!
The King – without a Doubt!
Acute Degree — conferred on him –
Despot of Tyranny!
Royal – all but the Crown!
Be-throned — an orange buffoon
God send us Patience –
When he –bold –Statement to Statement –
Groan – to Groan –
Brash – Blustered – Shouted –
In a Day –
Our Misery
"My Savior" – cultists say –
Stroking his Vanity –
Is this – the way?

By Emily Dickinson:

Title divine – is mine!
The Wife – without the Sign!
Acute Degree — conferred on me –
Empress of Calvary!
Royal – all but the Crown!
Betrothed — without the swoon
God sends us Women –
When you – hold – Garnet to Garnet –
Gold – to Gold –
Born – Bridalled – Shrouded –
In a Day –
Tri Victory
"My Husband" – women say –
Stroking the Melody –
Is this – the way?

Look At This Photograph

10/20/2019

From our entertainment editor, Q. L. Dickinson:

Emily Dickinson wrote...

The Past is such a curious Creature
To look her in the Face
A Transport may receipt us
Or a Disgrace –

Take a look at the baby pictures below from the past, a curious creature indeed. What do you think? Do they offer some "transport" -- or do they suggest some "disgrace"?

Below left: A baby picture of Donald Trump (he is crying in the picture -- not because his parents kept him locked in a cage mounted outside a window in their high-rise apartment -- but due to the pain brought on by his bone spurs).

Below right: A baby picture of Mitch McConnell.

Below left: A baby picture of Mike Pence. Below right: A baby picture of Lindsey Graham.

Face Off

11/15/2018

From our entertainment editor, Qwerty Lee Dickinson:

In perhaps the most perfect casting decision ever, Warner Brothers announced today that Mitch McConnell has been signed to play Two-Face -- the most demonic fiend the public has faced -- in an upcoming Batman movie.

"We'd been eyeing McConnell for this role for some time," said Sydney Corbin of Warner Brothers' project casting.

"However, he clinched it when he published an op-ed piece one day asking the Democrats to support bipartisan efforts, and then the very next day he vowed to block a bipartisan bill to protect Robert Mueller and the investigation into Russian meddling in our 2016 election. We knew at that time that we had found our demon!"

"Of course, McConnell's naturally creepy looks sealed the deal," she added.

Details about the film -- tentatively called "Speaker of Evil" -- will be soon be released.

Corbin noted that McConnell's horrific looks (both with and without makeup) called to mind a poem by Emmett Lee Dickinson called "A Harm infects his face" (below left). Dickinson's poem inspired third cousin Emily to pen her poem "A Charm invests a face" (below on the right).

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

A Harm infects his face
Imperfectly beheld –
The Mutant dare not show his Form
For fear we be repelled –

But peers behind his mask –
And hisses – in disguise –
Lest scrutiny – reveals his warts
That Image – horrifies –

By Emily Dickinson:

A Charm invests a face
Imperfectly beheld –
The Lady dare not lift her Veil
For fear it be dispelled –

But peers beyond her mesh –
And wishes – and denies –
Lest Interview – annul a want
That Image – satisfies –

The White Elephant in the Room -- Part 2

1/21/2018

From our political correspondent, Dorothy "Lottie" Dawe:

Less than two weeks ago, the magnanimous Donald Trump welcomed a bipartisan gathering of lawmakers by proclaiming that he wanted a “bill of love” to solve the issue with the DACA dreamers.

That sure didn’t last long.

Soon after Trump’s lovey-dovey smooch-fest, Senators Durbin and Graham showed up at the White House with the draft of a bipartisan solution; however, some of the “very fine people” on Trump’s staff and in the GOP who favor white supremacy were there to shut their work down. Trump exploded in a tirade and declared he wanted no more immigrants from “shithole countries.” No, he and his clan only wanted white émigrés from European countries like Norway.

Later, Mitch McConnell pitted health care for children against the dreamers – “pick one,” he demanded of Democrats. Plus, the GOP literally weaponized the Children's Health Insurance Program, stating out loud that is was nothing but a bargaining chip in the nasty politics leading to the “Trump shutdown.”

In the meantime, Trump continued to stoop lower and lower with absurdist and racist-based Willy-Horton-type declarations stating, for example, that democrats are “complicit” in all murders by illegal immigrants (fortunately, Trump’s family and followers don’t know what “complicit” means, so that bigoted comment is probably lost on them).

This, from a man who proclaims that he is a “great unifier." This, from the man who said he "absolutely" would be a force for bipartisanship. This, from the man who said he was “the least racist person” ever.

It is abundantly clear that Trump and GOP are not "America First.” No, they are "White America First" as they attempt to “select their own Society" as noted in a visionary poem by Emmett Lee Dickinson (Emily Dickinson's third cousin, twice removed -- at her request). Dickinson's poem (below on the left) inspired third cousin Emily to pen her poem "The Soul selects her own Society" (below on the right).

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

The GOP selects their own Society –
Then – shuts the Door –
To their “divine” Majority –
They take no more –

Unmoved – they note their Spurious –
causes –
To their low base –
Unmoved – their Emperor keeps tweeting
Lies just in Case –

Dishonor – for our ample nation –
And Pain –
They -- chose the Value of distraction –
For Gain –

By Emily Dickinson:

The Soul selects her own Society –
Then – shuts the Door –
To her divine Majority –
Present no more –

Unmoved – she notes the Chariots –
pausing –
At her low Gate --
Unmoved — an Emperor be kneeling
Upon her Mat --

I've known her – from an ample nation –
Choose One –
Then – close the Valves of her attention –
Like Stone –

To read Part 1 of "The White Elephant in the Room" (from November 2016), click HERE.

The Thanksgiving Countdown (5th of 5 posts)

11/22/2017

From our political correspondent Dorothy "Lottie" Dawe:

At a White House press briefing the other day, Sarah Huckabee Sanders required each reporter to state what he or she was thankful for before asking a question. The answers were varied and interesting. One said she was thankful for the First Amendment. Another was thankful for Robert Mueller and his team of investigators. Still another was thankful that President Obama had saved the nation from the Bush-Cheney recession in 2008.

Interestingly enough, in this season of thankfulness, Good Housekeeping recently published a cover article with a similar theme. The article was entitled “Trump and his Clan: What Are They Thankful For?”

What were Trump and his administration thankful for?

Donald Trump: "I am so very thankful for the poorly educated. They have really bought it all, and I couldn’t have done any of this without them."

Donald Jr: "Even if dad reverses the elephant trophy policy or not, he said I can kill elephants now and bring home their tusks. He doesn’t care."

Ivanka Trump: "Aquazzura has come out with some new shoe designs, so I’m going to be 'designing' some new shoes soon."

Jared Kushner: "I am very thankful that we’ve done a great job convincing our base that this 'Russia thing' is fake news. Of course, if I do end up going to prison, I’ll get a pardon. Isn't it incredible how Trump’s convinced everyone that he’s the 'law and order' president?"

Eric Trump: "Don and I get to shoot hibernating bears now."

Sarah Huckabee Sanders: "I can't tell you how thankful I am that my father taught me how to lie so easily."

Mike Pence: "I am very fortunate to have two mothers, and my younger mother is always around to help me control my lust when other women are around."

Stephen Miller: "What a blessing it is that tiki-torches are now the GOP’s thousand points of light. I fit right in now."

Mitch MCconnell: "I’m thankful that in America it’s always 'too soon' to talk about gun control. And remember how people wanted congress to ban bump stocks? They’re so forgetful too. People won’t talk about bump stocks again until the next mass murder, and then that will be 'too soon.”'

Paul Ryan: "I'm grateful that so many old, white men control the house and senate -- who better to legislate the control over women's bodies?"

Jeff Sessions: "I'm thankful that I have the opportunity to reverse progress on all this civil rights mumbo jumbo."

Kellyanne Conway: "I am so thankful I have no conscience or soul. That literally allows me to say anything for money, and I have no regrets or shame."

Pictured below left and right: Two of the Trump's official Thanksgiving Cards.

Pictured at the left: The 2017 Thanksgiving Menu at the White House -- with delicious international entrees:

* Medallions of Hibernating Bear Cubs
* Elephant Steaks
* Trio of Endangered Species Casserole (including Western Lowland Gorilla, Black Rhinocerous, and Bernean Orangutan.

Click the image to enlarge.

Because You Can Stop For Death!

6/28/2017

From our political correspondent Dorothy "Lottie" Dawe:

Donald Trump surprised the press today by announcing that he'd have a big surprise announcement soon about healthcare. Seems that the great deal maker can't make any sort of deal, so he's busy behind the scenes giving away the store trying to salvage any sort of deal with the GOP.

What could his big announcement be?

Well there's no need to wait any longer. We have the scoop on what Trump's big surprise is: he, Mitch McConnell and Paul Ryan plan to open a chain of affordable funeral parlors around the country. Can't afford healthcare? Trump, McConnell and Ryan Funeral Homes will offer funerals at very affordable rates.

Is it possible that Emmett Lee Dickinson's now-classic poem "Upon Concluded Lives" (below on the left) inspired the three of them to establish this chain of funeral parlors? We're not sure. However, the poem did inspire third cousin Emily to pen her poem with the same opening line (below on the right).

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

Upon Concluded Lives
There’s nothing cooler calls –
Than Profit’s Calculations –
When mixing Bells and Palls –

Make Elegiac Tunes –
That’s music to my Ears –
‘Tis Lucrative – these Funerals –
Collecting – on the Tears –

By Emily Dickinson:

Upon Concluded Lives
There's nothing cooler falls –
Than Life's sweet Calculations –
The mixing Bells and Palls –

Make Lacerating Tune –
To Ears the Dying Side –
'Tis Coronal – and Funeral –
Saluting – in the Road –

Below: An advertisement for Trump, McConnell, and Ryan Funeral Homes,
soon to offer affordable funerals in all fifty-states.

The Picture of Poor Health

1/18/2017

From our political correspondent Dorothy "Lottie" Dawe:

The swamp is filling up -- and Donald Trump and the GOP are stocking the swamp with some of the most frightening creatures ever seen in Washington. A senate panel’s been grilling Tom Price, the nominee to head Health and Human Services under the Swamp King. Known as a “one man death panel,” Price even voted “NO” on expanding the Children's Health Insurance Program.
The terrors of “Mr. Trump’s Asylum of Horrors” at the Capitol, reminded us of Emmett Lee Dickinson’s poem “To know just how you suffer would be dear” (below on the left). His poem also inspired Emily Dickinson to write “To know just how he suffered would be dear” (below on the right).

The sarcasm in Emmett Lee Dickinson’s poem certainly mirrors the GOP’s position and their disgusting rush to pull the plug on health care for millions of Americans – and it certainly fits right in with Mitch McConnell’s sentiments (“If the uninsured are going to die then they had better do it and decrease the surplus population”).

Pictured at the right: "On Stage at Mr. Trump's ASYLUM OF HORRORS, Tom Price, the One Man Death Panel." Click the image to enlarge.

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

To know just how you suffer would be dear;
To know we pulled the plug would be so nice
To know we’ve flourished with our
wayward ways
Until you settle firm in Paradise.

To know you were a patient we’re content
And that you’re dying we’re indifferent
It is a pleasant day to die
And in the sunshine go your way.

You’re furthest from our minds we must admit,
In such a distant way
The news says we’ve ceased human caring
On such a day.
And you wish you had coverage
But just sigh, accented,
You’re expendable to us.
And we are confident but still
We hope you wrote an everlasting will!

And when we vote, the ACA’s lost
At last
You’ll be broke off from
All coverage you had!

Don’t be afraid, be tranquil.
We all know
How your unconsciousness will grow,
No need for coverage when you’re blest to be
Met – at the junction of Eternity!

By Emily Dickinson:

To know just how he suffered would be dear;
To know if any human eyes were near
To whom he could entrust his wavering gaze,
Until it settled firm on Paradise.

To know if he was patient, part content,
Was dying as he thought, or different;
Was it a pleasant day to die,
And did the sunshine face his way?

What was his furthest mind, of home, of God,
Or what the distant say
At news that he ceased human nature
On such a day?
And wishes, had he any?
Just his sigh, accented,
Had been legible to me.
And was he confident until
Ill fluttered out in everlasting well?

And if he spoke, what name was best,
What first,
What one broke off with
At the drowsiest?

Was he afraid, or tranquil?
Might he know
How conscious consciousness could grow,
Till love that was, and love too blest to be,
Meet—and the junction be Eternity?

This Is Going to Hurt Like the Dickens!

1/12/2017

From our 19th century historian Eudora Dickinson:

Emmett Lee Dickinson (Emily Dickinson’s third cousin, twice removed – at her request) and Charles Dickens met several times in the late 1800s, and Dickens was admittedly an avid reader of Dickinson’s poems. Dickens, in fact, made it no secret that he conceived the character of Ebenezer Scrooge in A Christmas Carol after reading Dickinson’s now classic poem “The right to perish is their thought” (below on the left). Dickinson’s poem also inspired third cousin Emily to pen her poem “The right to perish might be thought” (below on the right).

Of course, Emmett Lee Dickinson was quite a visionary, and the subjects and themes of much of his poetry ring true to this day. For example, the poem below, “The right to perish is their thought,” seems to depict the current despicable moves on the part of the GOP to deprive health insurance to millions of Americans.

“If the uninsured are going to die then they had better do it and decrease the surplus population,” growled Mitch McConnell as he took the first steps in the Senate to pull the plug on the health care needs of Americans.

“If I could work my will,” echoed Paul Ryan in the House, “every idiot who tweets #SaveACA should be boiled in his own chicken soup and buried with a hypodermic needle through his heart.”

Are their shameful actions straight out of Dickinson – or Dickens – or both?

Pictured at the right: Mitch McConnell is delighted at the passing of another American on whom he pulled the plug.

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

The right to perish is their thought
The undisputed Right –
Accept it, all the Uninsured
And don’t put up a fight
With outright glee the GOP –
Elects to pull the plug
By nature all mankind does pause
To hear their, “Bah! Humbug!”

By Emily Dickinson:

The right to perish might be thought
An undisputed right –
Attempt it, and the Universe
Upon the opposite
Will concentrate its officers –
You cannot even die
But nature and mankind must pause
To pay you scrutiny.