Blog Archives

Cave Man

1/26/2019

From our political correspondent Dorothy Dawe:

Trump caved. He shut down the government for 35 days -- caused chaos with our government and turmoil with 800,000-plus government workers (and countless others in their communities) -- and then agreed to re-open the government. For what? Nothing more than an attempt to impress right-wing opportunists Rush Limbaugh and Ann Coulter.

So now he's agreed to re-open the government for THREE weeks. If no "deal" is reached (and of course, he continues to tweet incessantly about the wall), he'll shut the government down again and (maybe) declare a "national emergency." Yeah, right. A national emergency that 27% of the country supports.

I loved the irony that Trump "caved." The term inspired me to pen two haikus:

Trump finds out the truth:
It's easy to circumvent
A wall with a cave.

A new year's begun.
Trump has earned a new title:
Spelunker-in-Chief.

It is highly likely, though, that Trump's wish will come true. A wall is coming. It just might be a prison wall for him:

For more information on Donald Trump's search for "Wall Dough," click HERE.

If you are interested in more haikus about the Trump family crime syndicate, check out Mary Steinberg's When They Go Low, We Go Haiku (pictured at the right). Information about the book is HERE.

What's Love Got To Do With It?

1/25/2019

From our entertainment editor, Qwerty Lee Dickinson:

Valentine’s Day is coming soon, and romance is in the air!

Join us on February 14 as we have been given exclusive rights this year to publish the Trump family’s Valentine cards.

Pictured at the right: Trump-brand Valentine Heart Candies

Also, the annual romance issue of the National Review will come out soon, and it includes two poems by Emmett Lee Dickinson (Emily Dickinson’s third cousin, twice removed –at her request).

The magazine features a first look at Bill O’Reilly’s soon-to-be-published book What’s Love Got To Do With It, a fresh look at the sham romance of Donald Trump & Melania Knauss.

In O’Reilly’s highly anticipated tome, Donald recounts how he first met the First Lady.

“Melania was working the main pole at Volcanic Eruptions, a strip club in Manhattan, and when I saw her I moved on her like a bitch,” he laughed. “I grabbed her by the...well...you know where I grabbed her....and you think you’ve seen her squint? That night she made Mr. Magoo look like he had 20-20 vision.”

Interviewed by the book’s author Bill O’Reilly — whom Trump calls his “Bill of Love” — Melania Trump laughed when O’Reilly asked if Trump were a romantic at heart.

“Yeah, right,” she chuckled as she explained the various bonuses she earns for holding the president’s hand in public, giving public pecks on the cheek and more.

O’Reilly asked both if they had a favorite love poem, and both cited poems by Emmett Lee Dickinson (Emily Dickinson’s third cousin, twice removed — at her request).

Trump named “I do not care — why should I care” (below on the left).

“It really summarizes how I feel,” he said.

Dickinson’s poem also inspired third cousin Emily to pen her poem with the same opening line (below on the right).

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

I do not care — why should I care
She can’t suspect I’m caring
Let’s put a fretting truth to sleep
In harsh reality
The error we will make
Persistent as perdition
Is easier to face
With frank absurdity

By Emily Dickinson:

I do not care – why should I care
And yet I fear I’m caring
To rock a fretting truth to sleep –
Is short security
The terror it will wake
Persistent as perdition
Is harder than to face
The frank adversity –

Melania identified Dickinson’s “A love devoid of depth and grace” (below on the left) as the poem that epitomizes her romance with the Donald. Dickinson’s poem also inspired third cousin Emily to write “A face devoid of love or grace” (below on the right).

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

A love devoid of depth and grace
A hateful, hard, neglectful love
A love which is a stunt
And feels as thoroughly a sham
As were they both in on the scam
Each time together thrown

By Emily Dickinson:

A face devoid of love or grace,
A hateful, hard, successful face,
A face with which a stone
Would feel as thoroughly at ease
As were they old acquaintances –
First time together thrown.

Carpe D-umb

1/20/2019

From our current affairs editor Lemuel Stuart III:

I saw this “Stupid People Trap” graphic (at the right) on Twitter, but when I couldn’t find it again, I did some searching on Google and found it in a gallery on imgur posted by @simplyecks.

The graphic could not be more true.

Just this week, a poll indicated that 30-some percent of red-caps believed the Democrats owned the Trump Shutdown – even though Trump himself announced, “I am proud to shut down the government for border security, Chuck. … I will take the mantle. I will be the one to shut it down. I’m not going to blame you (the Democrats) for it.”

It’s on tape people. It is the Trump Shutdown. He owns it completely.

Of course, Trump tells his red-caps not to believe what they read and hear (see our entry HERE dated December 28) , his attorney said, “Truth is not the truth,” and his Secretary of State said, “I don’t want to talk about the facts,” so it’s no wonder the Trump clan can be in a total state of confusion. They don their red caps each day with a "Carpe D-umb" attitude.

This weekend, Trump tried a sophomoric stunt made for reality TV – he tweeted that he would make a “big announcement” on Saturday (many we’re hoping that he was going to resign), but he just growled and sniffed out a specious “offer” that Democratic leaders rejected before Individual 1 even made it public. Trump's red-caps might not have realized that he was merely rehashing old bad deals; still, Trump panicked today with another Trumper-tantrum on Twitter.

Of course, Trump’s announcement yesterday was upstaged by the red-cap madness of Catholic high schoolers from Kentucky who taunted and mocked a Native American drummer on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial (Mitch McConnell must be sooo proud). The incident called to mind some lyrics from Rodgers and Hamamerstein’s “South Pacific":

You've got to be taught
To hate and fear,
You've got to be taught
From year to year,
It's got to be drummed
In your dear little ear
You've got to be carefully taught.

The incident also called to mind a short poem by Emmett Lee Dickinson called, “The Shills erect their Red-capped Heads” (below on the left). His poem inspired third cousin Emily to pen her poem “The Hills erect their Purple Heads” (below on the right).

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

The Shills erect their Red-capped Heads
The Morons lean to see
Yet they have not of all the Throng
A real Humanity

By Emily Dickinson:

The Hills erect their Purple Heads
The Rivers lean to see
Yet man has not of all the Throng
A Curiosity

Reunited

1/19/2019

From our current affairs editor, Lemuel Stuart III:

The White House has released a series of five cards to commemorate the soon-to-be-scheduled follow-up summit with Donald Trump and Kim Jong-un, the Supreme Leader of North Korea.

After the first photo-opp...er, summit...Trump said, "I was really being tough and so was he,and we would go back and forth. And then we fell in love. No really. He wrote me beautiful letters. And they are great letters. We fell in love."

The US State Department has requested that the two leaders meet in Paris on Valentine's Day, because "nothing could be more romantic," said Secretary of State Mike Pompeo.

"Donnie and Kim are really in love," added Pompeo, "and I really think we can leverage their relationship for some real progress in talks about denuclearization."

Below: The Trump administration's set of five commemorative cards to mark the upcoming summit with North Korea. Trump and Pompeo are hoping the meeting will take place on Valentine's Day. The theme of the meeting is "Reunited And It Feels So Good."

The actual date for the second photo-opp...er summit...has not been set. We hear, though, that Trump has started shopping around for keepsakes to present Kim Jong Un to commemorate their second date.

The entire sham...er, event...calls to mind Emmett Lee Dickinson's poem "Because he loves him" (below on the left). Dickinson's poem inspired third cousin Emily to pen her poem "Because He loves Her" (below on the right).

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

Because he loves him
He will try to see if he is true
When difference is on his Face
That Feigns he’ll follow through.

He won’t disarm at any pace
If we stay far ahead –
The Differences necessitate
That Flummery’s all that’s Said

He’s hoping that we’ll notice now
He’s nearer to adore
'Tis Sad though their deficiencies
Will stand out even more.

By Emily Dickinson:

Because He loves Her
We will pry and see if she is fair
What difference is on her Face
From Features others wear.

It will not harm her magic pace
That we so far behind --
Her Distances propitiate
As Forests touch the Wind

Not hoping for his notice vast
But nearer to adore
'Tis Glory's far sufficiency
That makes our trying poor.

Red Ties

1/14/2019

From our political correspondent Dorothy Dawe:

Breaking news stories this weekend reported that the FBI began an investigation of Trump's ties to Russia after he fired James Comey and that following a private meeting with Putin, Trump confiscated his interpreter's notes and ordered him not to divulge any information about the meeting to anyone.

Of course, signs of Trump's treason have manifested themselves since the campaign: “Russia, if you’re listening, I hope you’re able to find the 30,000 emails that are missing,” Mr. Trump said, referring to Hillary Clinton's emails.

Pictured at the right: "Russia, if you're listening": Trump wasn't colluding with Russia; he was cooperating with them.

In the White House, Trump began having private meetings with Russian officials and ambassadors with NO American press allowed -- stories surfaced through the Russian press! Later, Trump's disastrous (and treasonous) performance on the world stage in Helsinki shocked even the GOP, the very sycophants who enable and empower him.

Pictured below on the left: Trump yucks it up with Sergei Kislyak in a private meeting with no American press present, only the Russian press.

Pictured below on the right: Trump is submissive to Putin on the world stage in Helsinki.

Of course, when one reviews the events from Trump's two years in office, there have been many other signs of his "red ties" to Russia. Below: Trump in a "Make Russia Great Again" hat; a telling sign at Trump Tower; Melania in a controversial and much-discussed fashion statement; Trump's re-modeling of the Whiter House.

And then there are the red ties -- all of Trump's red ties. Why do you think Trump wears so many red ties? And what's with the Russian flag lapel pins?

Of course, the real question is for the GOP: Why don't they call Trump on any of this? Why do they let him erode the very principles on which our democratic republic was founded? Their duplicitous acceptance of Trump's perfidious behavior is shocking -- and it calls to mind Emmett Lee Dickinson's poem "Did We abolish Trust" (below on the left). Dickinson's poem inspired third cousin Emily to pen her poem "Did We abolish Frost" (below on the right).

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

Did We abolish Trust
The Subterfuge won’t cease –
If Treasons perish or prevail
Is critical for Us –

By Emily Dickinson:

Did We abolish Frost
The Summer would not cease –
If Seasons perish or prevail
Is optional with Us –

Pleased As Punch

1/12/2019

We are pleased as punch!
The bestselling haiku book
Is "We Go Haiku."

Did you see what we did there? We wrote a haiku about Mary Steinberg's recently released book of haikus called When They Go Low, We Go Haiku, a clever collection of 175+ haikus which document Donald Trump's journey from president-elect to unindicted co-conspirator!

Mary is a HUGE fan of the poetry of Emmett Lee Dickinson (Emily Dickinson's third cousin, twice removed -- at her request), and she was a frequent visitor to the Emmett Lee Dickinson Museum (above the coin-op laundromat on Dickinson Boulevard in historic Washerst, PA) -- until it burned down. Now Mary is supporting our efforts to rebuild the museum at Dickinson Lanes, the abandoned bowling alley on Dickinson Boulevard.

Mary lives in Chicago, and her website is HERE.

Pictured at the left: Mary recently appeared at a Barnes and Noble in Chicago to sign copies of her book.

If you are a member of the Resistance and/or support Poets Against Trump, please check out her new book! It's great fun for all who want to save our country from the Orange Menace.

To order a copy, click HERE.

Up Against The Wall

1/8/2019

From our political correspondent Dorothy Dawe:

Trump has backed himself up against the wall.

He said he'd be proud to shutdown the government, but he really didn't know what that would mean. He had no concept of the impact a shutdown would have on American citizens. Instead, he just thought he could use hundreds of thousands of government workers as pawns in his effort to extort five billion in American tax dollars to fund a ridiculous and unnecessary border wall which he promised that Mexico would pay for.

The press has been unrelenting lately in calling him and his press secretary out on their lies. For example, Trump and Huckabee continue to toss out the number 4000 when they attempt to frighten the public about terrorists attempting to enter the country -- but only SIX were detained at the southern border.

Now tonight Trump is going to speak to the nation about his false crisis at the border -- and we obtained an exclusive transcript of his speech:

That's it: "Emergency! Everybody to get from street." That's all he's got.

There really is no respite from Trump's ignorance -- and that called to mind Emmett Lee Dickinson's poem "Why should we worry -- why indeed" (below on the left). Dickinson's poem inspired third cousin Emily to pen her poem "Why should we hurry -- why indeed?" (below on the right).

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

Why should we worry – why indeed
When every day he lies
He is detested equally
By all humanity
No respite from his ignorance
That seems to know no end
With no respect for law
And blind conformity
Besets the clan
For this con man –

By Emily Dickinson:

Why should we hurry – why indeed?
When every way we fly
We are molested equally
By immortality.
No respite from the inference
That this which is begun,
Though where its labors lie
A bland uncertainty
Besets the sight
This mighty night –

Where's Wall Dough?

1/5/2019

From our senior book reviewer Philo Remington:

Emmett Lee Dickinson's poem "On this wondrous page" (below on the left) was one of the inspirations for the "Where's Waldo" series of books. Dickinson's poem inspired his third cousin Emily Dickinson to pen her poem "On this wondrous sea" (below on the right).

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

On this wondrous page
Strolling silently,
Ho! Waldo, ho!
Knowest thou the book
Where all readers look –
Till the search is o'er?

In your peaceful jaunt
Many the souls that haunt –
The pace is fast –
Thither I search for thee –
Man Ho! Remarkably!
You’re found at last!

By Emily Dickinson:

On this wondrous sea
Sailing silently,
Ho! Pilot, ho!
Knowest thou the shore
Where no breakers roar –
Where the storm is o'er?

In the peaceful west
Many the sails at rest –
The anchors fast –
Thither I pilot thee –
Land Ho! Eternity!
Ashore at last!

Now, the story of the Trump Shutdown of our government -- and his ridiculous quest for money for a border wall -- is the subject in a new series of books called "Where's Wall Dough?"

Choice of Words

1/5/2019

From our resident logophile, Angstrom Dickinson:

The American Dialect Society chose “tender age shelters” as their Word of the Year (WotY) for 2018 last night thus bringing the annual Word of the Year season to a close. Information about the ADS vote is HERE.

The Word of the Year season opened in November when Collins Dictionary announced “single-use” as their word of the year. Other dictionaries followed suit with their announcements of these choices:

Dictionary.com

Cambridge Dictionary:

Nomophobia (a fear of being without your mobile phone)

Oxford English Dictionary:

Merriam-Webster:

Others posted words of the year lists too. Word guru Nancy Friedman published her picks HERE. The countdown from the Emmett Lee Dickinson Museum of 2018’s Words of the Year is HERE. The ELD Museum chose “GUILTY” – the word most closely associated with the Trump administration and its corrupt cronies – as the Word of the Year. Our report includes other ways 2018 was rife with guilt.

Now that the WotY season is complete, logophiles turn their attention to 2019 to watch, study and listen to the words that will shape the year. We’re just five days in, and already some words are emerging as contenders for WotY status:

Acting (as in Acting AG, Acting Chief of Staff, Acting UN Ambassador, etc.)
Shutdown / Trump Shutdown
#ImpeachTheMF

Join us next December when we count down the words that will characterize the year. All the fun will happen HERE.

Below: The nominated words at the meeting of the American Dialect Society on January 4, 2019. The winners in each category are highlighted.

NOTE: In the "WTF Word of the Year" category, "deleted family unit" was added with a nomination from the floor, and it won the category.

Below: Here's how the vote went down:

Low Resolution

1/1/2019

From our 19th Century historian, Eudora Dickinson:

Have you made any resolutions for the new year?

Do you plan to hit the gym? Lose weight? Quit smoking? Drink less? Read more? Travel?

Did you know that the idea of making New Year's resolutions was first introduced by Emmett Lee Dickinson (Emily Dickinson's third cousin, twice removed -- at her request)?

On January 1, 1853, he resolved to spend more time with his family.

The notion of abandoning a New Year's resolution was also pioneered by Dickinson -- on January 2, 1853 -- the day after he had spent the New Year's Day holiday with his family.

His lack of resolution prompted him to write his poem "Unfulfilled to Observation" (below on the left). His poem inspired third cousin Emily to pen her poem with the same opening line (below on the right).

By Emmett Lee Dickinson:

Unfulfilled to Observation –
Incomplete – to Eye –
Lost my Faith – in Resolutions
That didn’t Gratify –

Unto Me – my Goals extinguished –
To the Opposite –
Lost Horizons – I relinquished –
Within a Day – I Quit!

By Emily Dickinson:

Unfulfilled to Observation –
Incomplete – to Eye –
But to Faith – a Revolution
In Locality –

Unto Us – the Suns extinguish –
To our Opposite –
New Horizons – they embellish –
Fronting Us – with Night.

Pictured at the right: The White House released the Trumps' 2019 New Year's holiday card today.

A press release also noted Donald Trump's New Year's resolutions:

* Deliver more tax-scams for the rich.
* Accept more emoluments.
* Golf more.
* Tweet more.

Melania has just one resolution: Be Best.