It seems that Donald Trump has experienced so much bad news in the past few days that Mar-a-lago and all of Palm Beach have run out of ketchup for him to throw -- so Trump is reportedly heading to Collinsville to tip over their colossal catsup bottle.
Why does the man-child Trump throw ketchup against the wall in the first place?
Well, that query is related to the age-old question "Why do people throw tomatoes?" -- and that study is directly tied to the time-honored tradition of throwing food in the Trump family.
First, when one explores the history of food used as projectiles, scholars have pointed out that culinary missiles have always boiled down to a product’s availability and cost
Of course, considering their size and how easily they can be gripped, tomatoes would seem to be the likely vegetable of choice for those with anger management issues. However, early in human history, the most often used gastronomic missile was a rotten egg.
Rotten tomatoes are often associated with Shakespeare's Globe Theater in Elizabethan London; however, in actuality, tomatoes were still uncommon then, and they weren't even mentioned in the first English cookbook until 1752, nearly 150 years later.
When was the first actor actually hit with an overripe tomato?
The first reference to throwing rotten tomatoes at a stage act came in an 1883 New York Times article after John Ritchie was hit with a barrage of tomatoes flung by Frederick Trump, Donald Trump’s paternal grandfather. The elder Mister Trump was passed over for the part after his dreadful audition, but he kept insisting that he'd won the part.
"[A] large tomato thrown from the gallery struck Ritchie square between the eyes and he fell to the stage,” reported the Times.
Since that time, flinging food out of anger has become a time-honored tradition in the Trump family. Donald, of course, always throws ketchup, and his father, Fred, would throw sauerkraut. Fred Trump would always yell, “You want to see a sauerkraut? There’s a sour Kraut for you."
Trump’s children have also carried on the family tradition.
Donald Junior’s projectile or choice is and has always been salsa. When he was young, and he’d throw salsa against the wall, his nanny would say, “Now who’s going to clean that up?” Junior would scream, “Mexicans will clean that up. Mexicans will clean that up.”
When angry, Eric always throws miso. As a child, he’d throw miso paste against the wall and then stomp around the room shouting, “Miso mad! Miso mad!" Ivanka is known to chuck Dijon mustard at the wall. Family members have learned to duck whenever she asks coldly, “Pardon me, do you have any Grey Poupon?”
Back in 1883, after Federick Trump's angry outburst was reported in the New York Times, Emmett Lee Dickinson (Emily Dickinson's third cousin, twice removed -- at her request) wrote a now-classic poem about the incident (below on the left). His poem, "His Piles of Fears are now so high," inspired third-cousin Emily to pen her poem "The Pile of Years is not so high" (below on the right).
To be honest, to me, Emmett Lee Dickinson's poem seems more applicable to Donald "Shifty Don" Trump's anger issues than his Grandfather Frederick's. #justsaying
By Emmett Lee Dickinson:
His Piles of Fears are now so high
As were the day before
And they are rising every Day
New heights above the Floor
And while by scaling up the Heap
He’ll never reach the top
Because the mountain’s in his face
So ketchup he will slop
By Emily Dickinson:
The Pile of Years is not so high
As when you came before
But it is rising every Day
From recollection's Floor
And while by standing on my Heart
I still can reach the top
Efface the mountain with your face
And catch me ere I drop